Unapologetically Embracing Autism: Why Textbook Answers Don't Always Fit

 

As an autism parent and advocate, I've learned that the journey with autism is far from a straight path. It's a winding road filled with ups and downs, triumphs and challenges. Today, I want to talk about something that's been on my mind lately: textbook answers to autism and why they don't always apply to everyone.

When we first start this journey, many of us turn to books, articles, and "experts" for guidance. We're looking for a roadmap, a set of instructions that will help us navigate this new terrain. And while these resources can be incredibly valuable, they often fall short in capturing the full spectrum of the autism experience.

You see, autism is as diverse as the individuals it affects. What works for one person may not work for another. The strategies that help my child might be ineffective for yours. And that's okay. In fact, it's more than okay – it's beautiful.

I've learned to embrace the uniqueness of our journey. Some days, my child thrives in his therapies and services, defying expectations and challenging preconceived notions about what autism "should" look like. Other days are more difficult, with sensory overloads and struggles to self-regulate. But here's the thing: both types of days are valid, and both are part of our story.

One of the most important lessons I've learned is that it's okay for me, as a parent, to have bad days too. For a long time, I thought I had to be strong all the time, holding in my feelings and presenting a brave face to the world. But that's not sustainable, and it's not healthy.

Behind closed doors, I was often a mess, grappling with the challenges and uncertainties of this journey. It took time for me to realize that my feelings – all of them – are valid and important. They're part of this journey too.

Sometimes, the energy around us during this journey can be negative. But I've come to see that even these difficult moments serve a purpose. They wake us up, make us stronger, and show us what we're capable of enduring.

So, to all the autism parents, caregivers, and individuals on the spectrum out there: it's okay if your experience doesn't match the textbook answers. It's okay if what works for others doesn't work for you. Your journey is unique, and that's what makes it beautiful.

Embrace the good days and the bad days. Allow yourself to feel, to struggle, and to triumph. And remember, you're not alone on this winding road. We're all in this together, creating our own answers as we go along.​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​